There Is A Point To All This

I was thinking very seriously last night about why I write this blog. Why do I? It can't be just because I enjoy writing. The time it takes to think of decent topics and take specific photos for those topics and actually write a post requires more effort than I would care to put into something just for the sake of doing it.

So I had to ask myself, is it just because I'm crazy passionate about what I believe in? That could play a role. In fact, it definitely does because I can't help but want to share the happiness the gospel of Jesus Christ brings me with others. As I've learned recently, not all of my readers believe in the same things I do. Why this was a revelation to me, you'll soon know. It seems like every time I post something even mildly controversial (and sometimes when I don't even intend for it to be controversial) I receive critical comments from readers who obviously disagree with me and feel the need to explain why I am wrong. Usually the first time I read these comments, it bugs me. As a human, I can't help but feel a tiny bit bothered that someone things I'm a hateful, ignorant, intolerant person because I think differently than they do. (This, by the way, is the very definition of intolerance--"unwillingness to accept views, beliefs, or behavior that differ from one's own.")

Thankfully, in the last few years, I've trained myself to not let these comments bother me. It's not at all that I don't care about what these people have to say, because I do. But I no longer allow their negativity, frustration, anger, etc. ruin my day or my life. I just can't afford to let that happen. It is my choice to take offense. It is my choice to be miserable. It is also my choice to be happy.

Once I made the mistake of commenting on some boy's status from my high school. He was bringing up the subject of gay marriage and I (stupidly, for I knew his political views) decided to give my two cents and wrote that I felt God intended marriage to be between a man and a woman, and made a suggestion that same-sex relationships be labeled civil unions instead so as not to alter the sacred nature and definition of marriage. The backlash I received for that simple comment was ridiculous. Everyone immediately attacked my views, calling me a "bigot" and a hater and some words I won't even say. NO one stood by me or even made an effort to understand my views. The comments that were made were plain cruel and completely out of line and basically the attacks got so bad that I had to delete the boy as a "friend." For some reason, I especially took offense to being called a bigot. A bigot?! I wanted to say. Every single person from my high school who knew ANYTHING about me, including that boy, knew I was about as far from a bigot as a person can be. In fact, many times I was told by classmates (who were not close to me at all) that I was the nicest person they'd ever met. People just liked me because I tried to be kind to everyone. I was not what I'd call "popular" because I didn't participate in many of the things that those particular classmates did, but I think that everyone liked me. When I finally realized how ridiculous that label was, (though it took me like a week to stop thinking about it, it bothered me so much) I made a conscious decision to not let people's words affect me. It wasn't like I was unaware that not everyone has the same beliefs as I do. But if they had a right to share their views, then so did I.

I may be a minority in the way I think, particularly as a Mormon. But in my mind, that makes my need even greater to share what I believe and stand firm in my values. So few people in modern day have the courage to share their convictions with others. I do not intend to be one of those people. I know in my heart what is right and I have to stand for it. In some ways, I have a responsibility to do so. This quote, for whatever reason, really resonates with me:

“The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.” ~JFK referencing Dante's Inferno

It is more important than ever that people courageously stand for goodness. And I have to admit--even if someone is at the complete opposite end of the political spectrum than I am, if they truly believe in a cause and stand for it, that is preferable in my mind to bearing no opinion whatsoever for the sake of neutrality.

So again, why do I write? It is not just to promote my political views, my morals, my values, my religion. As already stated, I feel that is important. But I also write to be a tiny positive light in this dark world. I write to record my joys and encourage others to triumph. I write to help others become their best self. I write to make ordinary things in life worthy of notice and appreciation. Like the writer William Wordsworth (though I do not consider myself to be like him in most respects), I write to "refresh [man's] sense of wonder...in the everyday, the commonplace, the trivial." In other words, I am trying to help my readers appreciate the little things. I want to motivate people to find joy in their personal journey. I want others to be happy. That's why I share what I believe and why I'm so enthusiastic about it. I am happy, and I want to spread the joy I feel from merely existing in this world with everyone. The gospel of Jesus Christ makes me happy. Because of it, I know that families are eternal. I know death is not the end. We are here for a purpose and we can obtain even greater happiness if we do not waste this life. I know these things.

Many people today do not believe in God's existence. I feel responsible for showing these people that He does. This video is kind of cute:

There is still goodness in this world. This video shows it.

If you ever have a question about something I believe in, please don't hesitate to ask me. I am happy to have a discussion with you. I promise I won't belittle your opinion.

Thank you for reading my blog, too. It means that I'm accomplishing my goal in a small way.

The Random Act of Kindness

I may need to revise my highlight of the day even though I still love that Dalin got to stay home today and that we got to spend the day Tenley. This new highlight was more of a random act of kindness that made my whole week. It's good to know there are still kind people out there. So anyway, I was at the checkout at Walmart, waiting to pay with Tenley in my front carrier pouch, when a former resident of King Henry apartments where I last worked saw me and came over to say hi and congrats on the new baby. We were just talking when, before I knew what was happening, he had pulled out his card, reached past me, and swiped it at the register, paying for almost $70 of stuff. Feeling shocked, embarrassed, and gratified at the same time, I thanked him profusely then he proceeded to help me get the items into my cart and out to my car where he loaded my trunk for me while I buckled Tenley in. I thanked him again and he told me no sweat and took my cart away.

That is an outstanding young man, I thought when I got in the driver's seat before I started my car. I wish I could do something to repay him for his kindness...Well, if you are single and looking for a great guy (I think he goes to UVU and lives near King Henry), I'll give you his name so you can track him down. ;) Anyway, his deed caught me off guard--so much so that I almost cried before I left the Walmart parking lot. I was really touched. I had hardly ever interacted with him at King Henry, I just recognized his face and knew his name. Immediately I wanted to "pay it forward" by doing something for someone else. I got my chance pretty quick. There was a homeless man sitting by the Walmart exit. I never know if the homeless people that gather there are legit or not, but every once in a while, I give something if I have it in case they are. I still had my $15 Walmart gift card in my hand because I hadn't had to use it, so when I reached the man, I rolled down my window and waved him over to me. "There's fifteen dollars on there," I told him. He thanked me sounding very sincere and I drove off hoping I really was helping someone.

I tell this story not to brag about my tiny act of kindness (which was mainly initiated only because of someone else's) but to make a quick point: It is always much easier to do a random act for someone when you've been on the receiving end of one yourself. I re-learned an important lesson today. I had forgotten about my resolve to live the Scout motto "Do a good turn daily." That young man helped me get back on track and I'm going to do my best to keep that motto in my heart, starting today.

What random acts of kindness have you given to others? 
What is one that you've received that meant a lot to you?

Kindness Weighs More Than Fat

I just read this article on Yahoo called "My Girlfriend Weighs More Than Me. So What?" and I have to say I thought it was fantastic. I think my favorite part was Ali's description of why he and Gloria connect so well: 

The fact is Gloria and I have so much in common. We feel the same way about our families - they are the most important people in our lives. Our parents taught us the value of hard work and good morals, and how we should conduct ourselves and treat other people. We also share an idiosyncratic sense of humor —we find things funny that other people don't.

I honestly loved this article and I am completely disgusted with some of the comments that people made to be cruel. I'll be honest, I have a lot of overweight family members, but that didn't even cross my mind as I read this. All I thought was that this sweet girl is a human being and she is probably nicer than most skinny people. I don't know that for sure, but I can tell by Ali's description of her that she is a gem. 

I truthfully do not care about the size of someone or their body. I love big people. More often than not, they seem to have a better nature and sense of humor than most thin people. Obviously it is preferable to be healthy but there are plenty of larger men and women who simply come from large stock and are still very healthy despite their stature. I know that Heavenly Father does not judge us based on our physical characteristics but on the intent of our heart so I ask: what gives us the right to judge others on their physical appearance? There are things I don't like about my own body and appearance but I hope more than anything that most people see past those things to the person I am inside. I hate when I hear someone make a comment about how a person looks or dresses because I know that that person is a child of God and that they are probably doing the best they can with the life they have. 

I think we (as humans) need to consider these quotes a little more seriously: 

"When I grow frustrated with someone I think, 'Watch yourself, that's a child of God.'" 

~Maya Angelou

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

~Author Unknown

"There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you finally see what goes on underwater, you realize that you've been missing the whole point of the ocean. Staying on the surface all the time is like going to the circus and staring at the outside of the tent." 

~Dave Barry

Surely I am not the only one who feels this way--I like a person so much the better when I find they have a kind, positive personality. I have met dozens of people who I initially thought were incredibly beautiful or attractive, but as soon as they began to speak they started to look less so because it became clear they had a very shallow and insincere persona. It works the other way, too. There are those who seem plain or ordinary upon first meeting them, but when I truly get to know them, their attractiveness increases dramatically. This happens more often than I would like to admit. Does that mean that my first impressions of people are often wrong? Or maybe it means that in my heart, I do slightly judge or stereotype others based on their appearance until I get to know them as a person. I think it is impossible to look at someone's outward appearance and not form an initial impression of them. The difference is looking at them thereafter with an open heart, and willing yourself to see the good in them if they have it. Every kind person I have met has an indefinable quality about them that makes them more attractive in my eyes because of who they are. I try to see the good in others because that is how I want people to see me. I personally do not want people to only notice my physical imperfections and decide on the type of person that I am based on those alone. 

For those of you who are extremely attractive and have a good heart, I think you are just extra blessed. Perhaps you are particularly beautiful because your genuine inner beauty radiates outward. For those of you who are extremely attractive, but cruel and judgmental inside, just ask yourself this: "What's the point of being pretty on the outside [if] you're so ugly on the inside?" (Jess C. Scott). (Also, I might add that I think pretty people look ugly the more I look at them and come to know their true character.)

I think the whole human race needs to resolve to be a little kinder to those around them. I personally will do so as well. Be kind, and remember that God looks at our hearts. 

This is the couple from the article. How cute are they?

What are your thoughts on this subject? Does outward appearance matter?
How did you like the article I referenced?

Kindness by Small and Simple Means

If you are struggling today, here is a little motivation for you:

I love this quote from The Hobbit (which you do not need to be familiar with to like it, too), as said by Gandalf the Grey: "Saruman believes it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. I've found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love." 

Such true words! I love that quote because it reminds me of a similar one by poet, William Wordsworth: "The best portion of a good man's life; his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love." 

It is a good idea to try going about our day seeking to help people. We may not feel like we can do much, but "by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise" (Alma 37:6). Very often, the kind things we do go unnoticed by others. It can be frustrating to feel unappreciated, but we must remember that God sees every act we perform and He knows the true intent of our hearts. Honest acts of kindness seek no reward. 

Do not be discouraged when the good things you do for others go unnoticed. The most important person of all notices them and He will bless you for your efforts when repayment is not your goal. 

I really enjoy this motivating quote by Marjorie Pay Hinckley--it has helped motivate me to action when I feel lazy or unenthusiastic about something: "Think about your particular assignment at this time in your life...our assignments are varied and they change from time to time. Don't take them lightly. Give them your full heart and energy. Do them with enthusiasm. Do whatever you have to do this week with your whole heart and soul. To do less than this will leave you with an empty feeling." 

Last, I liked a story that our bishop of the BYU Married 4th Ward (Bishop Call) told us a couple of Sundays ago at church. It has a message similar to Marjorie Hinckley's quote. There is no way my version will do it justice, but I'll try. Basically, he told us of a married couple that went to this restaurant that was rumored to have amazing steak. As the couple ordered, their waiter replied with "Done!" after each item. He not question the couple's order, he just responded enthusiastically, "Done!" When the food arrived, it was delicious and exactly what the couple had ordered. Very pleased with this experience, the husband decided to implement the waiter's willing attitude at home with his children. The children joke that this waiter ruined their lives because their father expected them to respond to their responsibilities and jobs with a "done" attitude. If they were given a task, their father wanted them to get up and do it, not wait or complain or postpone the work. After a few years, the family wanted to return to the restaurant so that they could once again see the waiter who had "ruined" the kids' lives. Once there, they requested the waiter, describing what he had done the previous time. The host said he thought he knew who they were referring to, and seated them. Sure enough, the same waiter came to wait on them. Only this time, when the family ordered, the waiter responded after each item: "Happily." The father was a little disappointed that the waiter had changed the phrase, but upon pondering further he realized that "happily" was an upgrade! He didn't just intend to get things done but to do so willingly and happily. 

I like this story because it encourages us to do the things we must do with joyful willingness. We should not complain or procrastinate or do a job halfheartedly. When you have a task, do it HAPPILY!

It has been a long, warm day here in Provo and I am more than ready for Dalin to come home from work so I can spend some much-needed time with him. My father-in-law sent out an email to the family today with a link to some beautifully restored historic pictures (most are from the early 1900s). I love history and I thought I would share the link with anyone who is interested, so here it is: 
http://photosilke.blogspot.com/2013/03/historic-pictures-restored.html.  The photos are very clear and detailed, and personally give me a sense of curiosity and interest in our country's history when I look at them. I hope someone else enjoys them as much as I did! Here are a few of my favorite ones from the link:

Look how many people! And look at their swimsuits in 1904! Crazy. 

1921 Home Economics Class. Look at how cute all the girls are.

Dramatic change in swimwear in 1922. 

St. Paul, 1908. So interesting!

P.S. I think it would be really cool if someone took the time to re-visit the places in the photos and take a new picture from the precise location to compare it 100 years later! Someone who has the time, means, and talent should really go do that... ;)

If you have any thoughts to add, share them with me by commenting below!

Light

Sometimes I think, "What is the point of having a blog?" It takes up a lot of time, adds a little bit of stress to my life when I can't think of something to say or when I realize I haven't posted in forever, and truthfully--not that many people read it (it tells me that...embarrassing!).

But sometimes I genuinely enjoy writing about a topic that I want to discuss. I want people to know how I feel on certain issues because that's just how I was raised. I'm somewhat outspoken and I like to share what I think. It doesn't bother me if people know a little too much about my life--I just want to be honest. I want everyone to know that I am okay with being "weird" or "different" (which comes naturally when you're a Latter-day Saint I think...). 

One of my friend's dads in high school told me that he thought I was so great because I am "so down to earth." I seriously did not even fully understand what that meant until I got older, but I assumed it was a compliment. Now I see what he means. I am pretty down to earth. I try to be positive and happy (and for the most part I am), but I have also matured enough that I can be realistic and recognize that I probably will not make a difference in more than a few people's lives. I am aware of the impact I had in high school as one of very few Latter-day Saints (less than ten throughout my four years there) and remember being told, "Olivia, you are so happy." Another asked me, "Olivia, why are you so happy all the time? And why are you so nice to everyone?" I don't know if they knew why there was such a noticeable difference in me then, but I know now that it was the light that is in everyone who knows and tries to live the gospel of Jesus Christ. It is truly amazing that we can see the happiness in others just by the light they emit from their eyes. 

I love this quote by Elder Eyring in our church, who explains what that light is:

"Every child of Heavenly Father born in the world is given at birth, as a free gift, the Light of Christ. You have felt that. It is the sense of what is right and what is wrong and what is true and what is false. That has been with you since your journey in life began." 

~Henry B. Eyring

I also love this one by Roald Dahl, (who is not LDS) as he recognizes that kindness and goodness make a person attractive more than anything else:

“A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

~Roald Dahl

I believe it is important that we be the type of people that radiate light. No matter what you believe, if you are standing for something that you instinctually know is inherently good, then go for it. I know my daughter will be a light in my life and I hope that I, as her mother, can teach her to recognize good from evil as she is raised in a world that is so much more wicked than the one in which I was born.

So I guess, my thought for today is shine the light. Everyone has a light. Channel yours and brighten it.

Also! I dare you to watch this quick video...and I dare you not to cry (it's a happy cry):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aup9M5HZawI

Pay attention to how you feel.