Being Pregnant: The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

I want to end on a positive note, so I'm going to begin this list in reverse. 
The Ugly~
1. Swelling legs and feet. I don't think I've had this visibly yet, however I have felt the effects. My feet ache from the weight of being on them for a long period of time, and my legs have started to feel numb when I use them a lot. 
2. Stretch marks. I have not spotted any yet, but it's only a matter of time. Most appear in the last few weeks of pregnancy. 
3. Feeling full to the point of bursting after eating too quickly. This happens to normal people, too, but when there is a baby taking up more stomach space, it feels really uncomfortable. 
4. Acid reflux. I have only experienced this one time and it was after drinking an entire can of Inca Cola (which I think has caffeine in it). It didn't hurt, but it felt like I had vomit coming up my throat for several hours. No more of that...ever.
5. Unfixable muffin top. I can't do anything about it while pregnant except deal with it. And try to wear clothes that don't pronounce it. 
6. Worrying about my body post-baby. I shouldn't care about this, but it's hard not to worry a little. I want to be able to do the things I normally do. And I don't want to feel un-cute. Hopefully breastfeeding will slim me down a lot more quickly. 

The Bad~
1. Waiting, waiting, waiting. It feels like she's never coming.
2. Getting emotional over new things. Like children getting hurt (even if it's on TV and it's fake). Or babies. Or when I mess up because of my pregnant body. 
3. Nothing from my old wardrobe fits. Even jeans that were big for me pre-pregnancy don't fit. Baggy shirts that seem promising? My belly still pokes out at the bottom. And worst of all, sometimes I don't notice right away until I feel a sudden breeze...also, maternity clothes are expensive! I'm pretty cheap so this is really frustrating for me--I just don't want to buy clothes I can only wear for like four months at a time! 
4. Feeling guilty. I wanted to wash the dishes and do the laundry and pick up the house...but I just couldn't do it all. 
5. Feeling overwhelmed. I have so many things I should and could be doing. I just can't anymore.
6. Perpetual exhaustion. Feeling tired (or never feeling energized) never seems to go away. 
7. Clumsiness. I dropped an entire bag of goldfish this morning. Then I was too frustrated and emotional about it, that I couldn't pick them up right away. 
8. Belly being in the way. I spill even a drop, it is guaranteed to land on my belly. I have also hit my belly into corners and things a few times which really hurts and freaks me out (I worry I've hurt the baby). 
9. Inability to pick things up easily. Sometimes I use my feet to pick something up because it's just so hard to bend over with a big belly in the way. And sometimes (I hate this) I bend down to get something but can't make it on my first try because my legs weren't spread enough to make room for my belly. 
10. Peeing. Often. Standing up, climbing stairs, descending stairs, getting out of bed, adjusting my legs, drinking something, baby squishing my bladder--all of these bring about an instant need to pee. And it's most annoying when it's only like a teaspoon's worth. So many ten-second trips to the bathroom it drives me crazy.
11. Leaking. From a few spots. Enough said...
12. Inability to sit on the ground. On my butt? No. Cross-legged? Nope. Kneeling? Definitely not. If I do these things anyway, I lose circulation in just a few minutes. 
13. Getting asked all the time about when you're due. If I weren't so impatient, maybe I wouldn't mind. But now it's just tiresome because I'm already counting down the days. 

The Good~
1. Knowing I'm bringing a new little spirit child into the world. And knowing she has unmeasurable potential. 
2. Growing our family! So excited to have a family of three!
3. Creating life. It is so cool that women have the ability to bring tiny new humans to this earth. I love reading about what is happening to my body and knowing that I have all the supplies to bring a healthy new life into the world. 
4. Feeling her grow and move inside me. Sometimes those kicks and stretches are uncomfortable, but I still enjoy feeling her push her little foot against my belly and her wiggling around. 
5. Buying things for her. I haven't needed to buy very much since we've received so many things used but it's so much fun to look!
6. Getting lots of hand-me-downs and baby gifts. People love buying baby stuff. And having the first grand-daughter (or first grandchild) for your parents has its merits. 
7. People asking about your baby. I don't really like talking about when she's coming (since it reminds me how long I have left) but I love telling people about how it's our first child, the name we like for her, and about how excited we are to have her. 
8. People go out of their way to talk to you and be nice to you. Seriously, everyone wants to hold the door for you and everyone wants to help you. No one minds loading your car for you or lending you a hand when you look like I do. 
9. Getting to eat whenever I want without people commenting. I snack and snack and everyone's like, "Keep eating, that baby needs nourishment!"
10. Willingness to serve increases in others. I've been getting a lot more help from friends, family, and husband with chores and others things. When you're pregnant, it isn't a burden for family members to help you out. 
11. Being given a break when you do something embarrassing or dumb. People make excuses for you like, "It's okay, you're pregnant," and being able to use the excuse of "pregnancy brain" which is real. 
12. Babymoons. We are so excited for our daughter to be here and wish she was already, but in the meantime, we try to take advantage of the small amount of time remaining that we will have alone. This means more eating out, special dates, etc. 
13. Being in charge of someone. We get to pick her name and choose how she will be raised. We get to dedicate our lives to this little daughter of God and help raise her to be the best she can be. 
14. Learning to become parents. We are already figuring out what kind of parents we will be and I cannot wait to see Dalin as a father. He is going to be the best ever! 
15. Knowing that, in the end, we will have an addition to our family and it will make all the waiting and discomfort 100% worthwhile. I simply cannot wait. No matter what, less than 50 days! (I don't think I'll have a choice after 43 from now anyway). 

P.S. I thought of number 16. No period. Best thing ever. 

What were your favorite or least favorite parts about being pregnant? 
(I've been really lucky with the sickness side--I only felt nauseous from about weeks 8-12 and I never actually got sick.)

My big baby belly. 35 weeks

Thoughts of a Conservative (and a Mormon)

I do not understand some people in America. I really don't. I do not understand how some of them can justly call themselves "American" and harbor the misconceptions that they do.

Fact: America was founded on religious principles. It was settled by pilgrims seeking religious freedom from an oppressive king. As much as some try to deny it (if you do, see here), this country was formed as a nation under God.

If you know anything about me, it's that I consider myself very conservative.  I found this great quote which reflects the views of The Social Science Encyclopedia: "Conservatism is a condition found among the mature, who have discovered what it is in life they most value." I would say that sounds about right. I will tell you the five things I most value: God; my husband and family; my religion (which goes along with my belief in God); freedom; children/life. When people suggest that my religion or conservative values are "outdated," I think to myself that their beliefs, in contrast, are unrealistic and ideological. I look at the world and see a lot of good people but also a lot of evil. Those on the opposite side of the fence see only the best of human nature. They think everyone deserves to live exactly how they want to live and, if given the freedom to do so, will choose to live responsibly. Their unrealistic expectations of the world and their ideas relating to this are attractive to those who similarly believe in the potential for an ideal society. They are also attractive to those who are "victimized" in actual society because it gives them a false sense of hope for a better future. The point is, these beliefs are unrealistic and ultimately impossible.

As a Latter-day Saint, I believe in agency. Before coming to earth, God gave us the ability to choose right or wrong for ourselves. Before choosing this, Lucifer (Satan) presented the plan that those who come to earth would have virtually no agency. They would only be able to "choose" goodness, which we realize is no choice at all. Lucifer's plan was rejected because God loves us so much He wanted us to be able to choose our own fate in this life--whether that meant returning to Him or choosing another path. I feel like those who believe in some kind of ideological world do not see the flaw in their thinking. Because people have agency, there always have been and always will be people who choose evil. This is one of our Heavenly Father's greatest gifts to mankind. I'm sure it makes Him very sad when one of His sons or daughters chooses this path but He loves us enough to allow us to choose for ourselves.

GUNS
I will just be scratching the surface in sharing some thoughts on this subject. To start, do people honestly believe that banning guns would eliminate gun violence? I will put my two cents in (since this is my blog and the First Amendment is still operative)--No, I do not believe that military grade weapons need to be in the hands of average citizens. Sure, it's a good idea to perform background checks before guns are sold to the public. Do we need semi-automatic guns in regular society? No. Do I think guns are bad? NO! I eat meat and I'm completely okay with hunting for the purpose of feeding one's family. I'm also okay with guns used for recreational purposes. But back to the original rhetorical question (do people honestly believe that banning guns would eliminate gun violence?), the "answer" is clear. There are always evil people out there. There are always those who are selfish and willing to hurt others to achieve their ends. Were there murderers and crimes committed before guns existed? Obviously. The point is, stricter regulations on guns does very little. Look at Mexico, which does not allow citizens to own anything larger than a .22 caliber weapon. Evidently, this law isn't very effective based on the fact that drug lords and criminals still find a way to make or purchase larger weapons. I've already discussed how eliminating guns entirely would never be effective. As proven by Australia, complete eradication of guns always results in greater violence, more crimes, and ultimately, public outcry. Criminals prey on the defenseless. I do not intend to foolishly leave my family vulnerable against an armed criminal. If someone does not share my views about this and can explain their thinking in a realistic way, I'd love to hear it.

I intended to go on into other subjects, but lucky for some of you, I am very tired and both physically and emotionally drained from the day. Don't worry though, I'll undoubtedly be sharing some more of my "old-fashioned" ideas in the future.

If you would like to read my views regarding abortion (another touchy subject), you can do so by clicking here. You can read about my opinion that the family unit is sacred right here. 

Our First Conversation...Ever. Humorous and Embarrassing.

It all started with Marisa...making us be friends on Facebook. Her persistance paid off ;)

Dalin: so we have a friend in common...

Olivia: haha we do / one friend / silly marisa  

Dalin: yep, so, i've never really just talked to someone on facebook that i've never met...do you know how this is supposed to go?

Olivia: haha is there a right way? / i don't know what was going on in marisa's head / but she spoke very highly of you...haha

Dalin: i dont think that there can be a right way but i'm sure it's been done before...she spoke pretty highly of you too

Umm...somehow our conversation turned from this to a discussion about how easy I would be to kidnap because of my size...only two hours later. Oh good, I made a comment about it at the time: 

Olivia: wow i like how you originally thought i like to murder people and now we're talking about you kidnapping me. we've come full circle. essentially. we probably are done talking forever

How weird are we (am I)? How did we even end up falling in love and getting married? I can't say I know based on this conversation, but I'm very glad that we did!!!!! I'm also glad that Dalin was able to see past my rude sarcasm and still like me somehow! 

The one good thing about our first time talking ever being on Facebook is that it is recorded forever. Unless Facebook goes obsolete, in which case I have this blog post. Unless blogger goes obsolete, in which case I wrote about the experience in one of my zillions of journals. So unless those get stolen or burned, and all technology fails, I'll have this forever. 

Do you have a weird story about the first time you met/spoke with your spouse? If so, I want to hear about it, so share below! 

Kindness by Small and Simple Means

If you are struggling today, here is a little motivation for you:

I love this quote from The Hobbit (which you do not need to be familiar with to like it, too), as said by Gandalf the Grey: "Saruman believes it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. I've found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love." 

Such true words! I love that quote because it reminds me of a similar one by poet, William Wordsworth: "The best portion of a good man's life; his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love." 

It is a good idea to try going about our day seeking to help people. We may not feel like we can do much, but "by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise" (Alma 37:6). Very often, the kind things we do go unnoticed by others. It can be frustrating to feel unappreciated, but we must remember that God sees every act we perform and He knows the true intent of our hearts. Honest acts of kindness seek no reward. 

Do not be discouraged when the good things you do for others go unnoticed. The most important person of all notices them and He will bless you for your efforts when repayment is not your goal. 

I really enjoy this motivating quote by Marjorie Pay Hinckley--it has helped motivate me to action when I feel lazy or unenthusiastic about something: "Think about your particular assignment at this time in your life...our assignments are varied and they change from time to time. Don't take them lightly. Give them your full heart and energy. Do them with enthusiasm. Do whatever you have to do this week with your whole heart and soul. To do less than this will leave you with an empty feeling." 

Last, I liked a story that our bishop of the BYU Married 4th Ward (Bishop Call) told us a couple of Sundays ago at church. It has a message similar to Marjorie Hinckley's quote. There is no way my version will do it justice, but I'll try. Basically, he told us of a married couple that went to this restaurant that was rumored to have amazing steak. As the couple ordered, their waiter replied with "Done!" after each item. He not question the couple's order, he just responded enthusiastically, "Done!" When the food arrived, it was delicious and exactly what the couple had ordered. Very pleased with this experience, the husband decided to implement the waiter's willing attitude at home with his children. The children joke that this waiter ruined their lives because their father expected them to respond to their responsibilities and jobs with a "done" attitude. If they were given a task, their father wanted them to get up and do it, not wait or complain or postpone the work. After a few years, the family wanted to return to the restaurant so that they could once again see the waiter who had "ruined" the kids' lives. Once there, they requested the waiter, describing what he had done the previous time. The host said he thought he knew who they were referring to, and seated them. Sure enough, the same waiter came to wait on them. Only this time, when the family ordered, the waiter responded after each item: "Happily." The father was a little disappointed that the waiter had changed the phrase, but upon pondering further he realized that "happily" was an upgrade! He didn't just intend to get things done but to do so willingly and happily. 

I like this story because it encourages us to do the things we must do with joyful willingness. We should not complain or procrastinate or do a job halfheartedly. When you have a task, do it HAPPILY!

It has been a long, warm day here in Provo and I am more than ready for Dalin to come home from work so I can spend some much-needed time with him. My father-in-law sent out an email to the family today with a link to some beautifully restored historic pictures (most are from the early 1900s). I love history and I thought I would share the link with anyone who is interested, so here it is: 
http://photosilke.blogspot.com/2013/03/historic-pictures-restored.html.  The photos are very clear and detailed, and personally give me a sense of curiosity and interest in our country's history when I look at them. I hope someone else enjoys them as much as I did! Here are a few of my favorite ones from the link:

Look how many people! And look at their swimsuits in 1904! Crazy. 

1921 Home Economics Class. Look at how cute all the girls are.

Dramatic change in swimwear in 1922. 

St. Paul, 1908. So interesting!

P.S. I think it would be really cool if someone took the time to re-visit the places in the photos and take a new picture from the precise location to compare it 100 years later! Someone who has the time, means, and talent should really go do that... ;)

If you have any thoughts to add, share them with me by commenting below!

Maternity Photo Shoot, 34 Weeks!

In case you haven't heard yet, I'm 34 weeks along! The anticipation and uncertainty are the worst parts of the third trimester. I just wish I knew she would be here for sure on the 5th so I could relax until then. I'm looking forward to my doctor's appointment this Thursday--they always seem to make things go a little faster. But for now, I'm just counting the days. 

Yesterday, we spent much of our Sunday afternoon by the duck pond on BYU campus taking maternity pictures with friends Stephanie and Emil. We had a lot of fun and were so grateful they were willing to spend that time with us to take some fun maternity pictures. And now I can relax, knowing I got that done and won't regret not taking pics once my baby belly is gone (which will hopefully be pretty quick!). 

Here are some of my favorite pics from the afternoon:

"An apple for serenity, a pendant for balance..." Haha this picture makes me think of Mulan.

We did some just for fun yoga poses to show off different angles of my belly

When I look at these, I cannot believe just how big my belly really is. It is so strange because even now looking down at it, it doesn't seem as big as it actually appears when I look in the mirror or at the pictures. Sometimes I walk by a full-length mirror and I go, "WOAH," in my head. Like who is that? I have to admit that the thing I am most excited about post-pregnancy (besides our daughter finally being here!) is getting my body back. Not fitting into any of my normal pants is really discouraging. Especially because I always had to wear a belt before being pregnant. But apparently my hips are wider than I realized--I know my pelvis has to widen to make a passage for the baby, but I did not think it would be as noticeable as it is! I just want to fit in my skinny jeans again!!!!!

But for now, I'm wearing lots of stretch pants, skirts, and getting good use out of my two pairs of maternity pants. Hopefully by September or October I can at least have a few more options in my wardrobe! 

If you want to see more pictures from Sunday afternoon, you can look at my Maternity Shoot album on Facebook!